Joshua came into our room at 4am this morning. When he does this, I usually run through a multitude of questions, "Is he sick?" "Did he have a bad dream?" Okay, I guess those are the only two I reall ask myself :) After him sleeping (or so we thought) with us for about 15 minutes, Nick carried him back into bed. I can usually fall right back asleep, but this time, I was kept wide awake with my thoughts.
The thoughts of sickness, pregnancies and death have been streaming through my mind. I find myself praying for so many that are sick. It seems there are far more in my life (or those that I know of) than usual. I don't know if I notice it more since Jenna struggles with her conditions, or if it's just this year. I also have a TON of pregnant friends or friends that have had babies this year. I need to sit down and write all of their names out on paper. It's a CRAZY amount! It's so fun to celebrate life with so many people :) On the down side, I also have known of so much loss this year. Little babies now sitting on the Lord's lap; sick adults finally finding peace after a long, drawn-out illness; and sadly, I just learned of one who passed who did not want to know the Lord. Their son, knowing of their eternal fate, still wished his mother "RIP." I think mostly to console himself through the shock of his loss.
Saddened by sickness, over-joyed with new life, and mourning over death. Such a mixture of emotions. I'm completely baffled by how "all at once" it is that I have a hard time spending time with my thoughts on just one particular instance.
Random thoughts... That's what you get from a sleep deprived mom at almost 5:30am :)
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